We went in yon hotel in Blackpool,
Bloke showed us to our room,
It twas so small thee couldn’t move,
Nay room to swing a broom.

Twoman sitting side of me,
Said leg fell off yon bed,
I said thy’d best tell governor,
Before thee’s too well fed.

Then twas at breakfast ‘pon next day,
I said has thee told him lass,
He’s chucked us higher up thee knows,
And now I’m freezing on yon toes.

Beds dip down in the middle,
One wardrobe twixt us two,
It be a great disaster,
But heck we’ll see it through.

There’s loads and loads of stairs,
Our legs they baint be good,
Those glad that they’re all flesh,
And none is made of wood.

Cocktail bar be best of all,
it’s a right real treat to sit in,
As for the of flipping place,
I’d sling it in the nearest bin.