When I was a little boy I looked up Mummy’s clothes,
I thought it was exciting but only saw panty hose,
I know she’s got a forest, crept in when she had a bath,
Saw she had two swingers and really had a laugh,

Why are mummies made all funny, two lumps are at the top,
A forest in between their legs, I’m told that’s where babies pop,
I have a little girlfriend, I told her what Mum’s got,
She told me not to worry, ‘cause grown ups aint too hot,
I asked her what she meant, she said just look at this,
She dropped her drawers and said stand back and then she done a piss.