Give me the old fashioned Xmas,
When we had chestnuts down by the fire,
When you hang up your big Xmas stocking,
It’s perhaps only tied up with wire.

As you woke up on Xmas morning,
You got out of bed with a jump,
You went and woke up your Mammy,
And gave dear Daddy a thump.

You wanted to show off your presents,
So off to your stocking you went,
But as you looked inside it,
You hadn’t got what you dreamt.

There was an apple, an orange,
Some coal and a couple of bob,
You couldn’t believe what you were seeing,
And loudly you started to sob.

What’s wrong our lass and why the tears,
You’re never satisfied,
What about poor Santa Claus,
Who’s having a very cold ride.

I’m sorry for Santa Claus Mummy,
I know he has toys to bring,
But it don’t do anything for my stocking,
Cause in there, there aint be a thing.

Aint much of a Xmas for me Ma,
On top of that Dad’s got the hump,
But if I go and tell him,
I know he’ll give me a clump.

Mum started to laugh as she saw the funny side,
I said let me in on the joke,
Dad’s out of work I’m up the duff,
And the both of us are broke.

That made me worse and I really got mad,
Some Xmas this is to be,
I’ve coal, and an orange and an apple,
It’s a wonder that we’ve got a tree.

Then Mam said to me go and look under the tree,
And see what there is on the floor,
Dashed into the front room tripped over the broom,
And bashed me head on the cupboard door.

I picked myself up and saw on the floor,
All presents neatly wrapped up,
I felt sorry that I had really got mad,
Twas Xmas we shouldn’t be sad.

I made tea for me Mum and gave Dad one too,
And said I was sorry to moan,
Dad’s tea slipped from his hand, was right real mad,
It went where it made him groan.

Yes give me those old Xmas days,
When we could laugh at such things,
With snow on the ground,
Coal on the fire and Xmas bells ringing.